Archive Version of
Partners Task Force for Gay and Lesbian Couples
Online from 1995-2022

Demian and Steve Bryant originally founded Partners as a monthly newsletter in 1986. By late 1990 it was reformatted into a bi-monthly magazine. Print publication was halted by 1995 when Demian published Partners as a Web site, which greatly expanded readership.

In 1988, the Partners National Survey of Lesbian & Gay Couples report was published; the first major U.S. survey on same-sex couples in a decade.

In 1996, Demian produced The Right to Marry, a video documentary based on the dire need for equality that was made clear by the data from the survey mentioned above. The video featured interviews with Rev. Mel White, Evan Wolfson, Phyllis Burke, Richard Mohr, Kevin Cathcart, Faygele benMiriam, Benjamin Cable-McCarthy, Susan Reardon, Frances Fuchs, Tina Podlodowski, and Chelle Mileur.

Demian has been the sole operator during the last two decades of Partners.

Demian stopped work on Partners Task Force in order to realize his other time-consuming projects, which include publishing the book “Operating Manual for Same-Sex Couples: Navigating the rules, rites & rights” - which is now available on Amazon. The book is based on the Partners Survey mentioned above, his interviews of scores of couples, and 36 years of writing hundreds of articles about same-sex couples. It’s also been informed by his personal experience in a 20-year, same-sex relationship.

Demian’s other project is to publish his “Photo Stories by Demian” books based on his more than six decades as a photographer and writer.


Partners Task Force for Gay & Lesbian Couples
Demian, director    206-935-1206    demian@buddybuddy.com    Seattle, WA    Founded 1986

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Holy Union — III
© 2000, Partners Task Force


The following sample marriage ceremony solemnizes a relationship.

While this may not be reproduced by any print or electronic means for distribution, permission to use this text is hereby given to individual same-sex couples for use in their personal commitment ceremonies.

Prelude

Personal Prose Reading

Opening Greeting

Entrance Song: “City of God”

Affirmation of Intention

Affirmation of Family & Friends

Reading: “Sts. Serge & Bacchus” (John Boswell, translation)

“Meanwhile the blessed Serge, deeply depressed and heartsick over the loss of Bacchus, wept and cried out, ‘No longer, brother and fellow soldier, will we chant together, “Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity!” You have been unyoked from me and gone up to heaven, leaving me alone on earth, made single, without comfort.’ After he uttered these things, the same night the blessed Bacchus suddenly appeared to him with a face as radiant as an angel’s, wearing an officer’s uniform, and spoke to him. "Why do you grieve and mourn, brother? If I have been taken from you in body, I am still with you in the bond of union, chanting and reciting, “I will run the way of thy commandments, when thou hast enlarged my heart.” Hurry then, yourself, brother, through beautiful and perfect confession to pursue, and obtain me, when finishing the course. For the crown of justice for me is with you.”
Response Song: “For All The Saints”

Reading: Paul’s First Letter to the Corinthians: 1-13

“If I had the gift of being able to speak in other languages without learning them, and could speak in every language there is in all of heaven and earth, but didn’t love others, I would only be making noise. If I had the gift of prophecy and knew all about what is going to happen in the future, knew everything about everything, but didn’t love others, what good would it do? Even if l had the gift of faith so that l could speak to a mountain and make it move, I would still be worth nothing at all without love. If I gave everything I have to poor people, and if I were burned alive for preaching the Gospel but didn’t love others, it would be of no value whatever.

“Love is very patient and kind, never jealous or envious, never boastful or proud, never haughty or selfish or rude. Love does not demand its own way. It is not irritable or touchy. It does not hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do it wrong. It is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever truth wins out. If you love someone you will be 1oyal to him no matter what the cost. You will always believe in him, always expect the best of him; always stand your ground defending him.

“All the special gifts and powers from God will someday come to an end, but love goes on forever. Someday prophesy, and speaking in unknown languages, and special knowledge — these gifts will disappear. Now we know so little, even with our special gifts, and the preaching of those most gifted is still so poor. But when we have been made perfect and complete, then the need for these inadequate special gifts will come to an end, and they will disappear. There are three things that remain — faith, hope and love — and the greatest of these is love.”

Alleluia Song: “Seek Ye First”

Gospel

Presider: A reading from the Gospel according to John (John 4:7-21)

Homily

Prayers of the Faithful

Presider:
For heavenly peace,

Response:
we beseech Thee, O Lord.

Presider:
For the peace of the entire world,

Response:
we beseech Thee, O Lord.

Presider:
For this holy place,

Response:
we beseech Thee, O Lord.

Presider:
That these thy servants, [Name-1] and [Name-2], be sanctified with thy spiritual benediction,

Response:
we beseech Thee, O Lord.

Presider:
That their love abides without offense or scandal all the days of their lives,

Response:
we beseech Thee, O Lord.

Presider:
That they be granted all things needed for salvation and godly enjoyment of life everlasting,

Response:
we beseech Thee, O Lord.

Presider:
That the Lord God grant unto them unashamed faithfulness and sincere love,

Response:
we beseech Thee, O Lord.

Presider:
For all those invited to join our joyous celebration today, who have been kept away by their own or other’s fears,

Response:
Loving God, hear our prayer.

Presider:
In thanksgiving for all who have gone before us, and for the gifts, lessons and legacies they have left us, and in particular for [Name-1] and [Name-2],

Response:
Loving God, hear our prayer.

Presider:
For all who are lonely,

Response:
Loving God, hear our prayer.

Presider:
That we may all hear when God’s Spirit is speaking within us, and find the strength to act when we hear God’s call,

Response:
Loving God, hear our prayer.

Presider:
In peace we beseech thee, O Lord, Have mercy on us, O God.

Response:
Lord, have mercy. Lord, have mercy. Lord, have mercy.

Offertory Prayers

We rejoice today, O God, as we’ve come together to marvel in the beauty of your human creation. We, your people, stand in awe of the gifts you have bestowed on us, in us, and through us. We rejoice especially today that you have given us [Name-1] and [Name-2], whose love draws each one of us here together and creates of us a brilliant tapestry of life. May they continue to weave strong bonds of family, friendship and love throughout their lives, so that through them many will know the meaning of communion.
Amen.

We thank you, most generous God, for giving us this gift of bread, made of earth and water and sun. We ask that in breaking and sharing this loaf today we might learn to break open and share ourselves with each other; and in so doing be fed by the food of one another’s souls. Help us to remember that you bring us together in love for a purpose, to strive together, hand-in-hand, until all people taste the bread of community and are filled in body and nourished in soul. Then we will know the fullness of communion.
Amen.

We celebrate you, Sweet Spirit, as we share the gift of wine. It runs deep and red as the blood coursing through our veins. We ask that in sharing this cup today we might know the fire in our own blood, the vibrant life that calls us into love beyond fear. For we know that it is only this kind of love, deep and true, honest and brave, that has the power to make our hearts whole and heal our broken world. Only in this love can we truly live as communion.
Amen.

And so, behold these gifts — our brothers, our bread, our wine. We invite you to come forward, to claim your place at the table, created by God, prepared by friends, offered as gift. Come share in this banquet of hope and love and joy.

Communion Sharing

Communion Song Blest Art They

Exchange of Peace

Benediction


This vow courtesy
Dignity / USA National Office
1500 Massachusetts Ave. N.W., #11, Washington, D.C. 20005
800-877-8797; 202-861-0017; fax 202-429-9808
dignity@aol.com
www.dignityusa.org


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